Over the last few years I have noticed a huge increase in the number of clients coming to see me for pornography addiction. With the easy access of porn on line, and on tablets and phones, many men are having trouble resisting the urge to view porn more and more often, and it can be scary how quickly this can turn to an addiction.
Some of the key elements in the development of a porn addiction are starting to watch porn at a young age, controlling or uninvolved parents, loneliness and isolation, seeing a model of unhealthy relationships and early sexual abuse.
Once you have realized that you are addicted, your path to freedom starts with the realization that you’ve lost control around sex. You begin to acknowledge that you’re acting regressively and that you are probably a mature man in many ways, but you don’t understand intimacy and have confused intimacy with sexual activity.
Another thing that can be a he realisation is that you can’t get enough of what won’t satisfy you. Objectifying and sexualizing people is an never ending, negative process that yields a few minutes of excitement, a brief orgasm, then hours, days, weeks, months and years of fear, pain, shame, self doubt, self criticism, judgement and anger.
Doing this work will free you from the shackles of your negative sexual story.
Many men who have done so look back and see this as their rite of passage into true manhood, free of old compulsive sexuality. You can then take the energy you are expending on addictive behavior and channel it into a more satisfying career, intimacy and better relationships with a partner and with your family and friends. You’ll really get a life in the full sense.
Counselling for Porn addiction with qualified and experience Psychologists is available in 60 locations Australia wide at the Hart Centre. Call 1300 830 552 to find out more.